Relationships Are Hard

Writing about them doesn't have to be.

Photo by Mayur Gala on Unsplash

There I was, making notes about a future post to be titled “All Stories Are Love Stories,” when I got a notification that Claire Taylor launched a new Kickstarter for Write Iconic Relationships. Of course, I backed it. But. She’s a mean woman and she won’t launch it officially until “enough people” click the Notify Me on Launch button. I need this book, people. Do me a solid and punch the button, please. 🙏 Also, you need it, too. For reasons.

I use the tools that Claire teaches with clients and in my own writing every day. My wife and I have also found them to be transformative in our personal lives.

Relationships Are Always Central to Your Story

Every character in your story has at least one relationship, even if it’s just with a volleyball. 🏐 In every working scene, this means that you have at least two relationships if it’s a two-way conflict. If you have a three-way conflict, there are six relationships to account for. It escalates geometrically from there. That’s a lot of moving parts to track, especially if you don’t know your characters very well.

Like me, you’ve read stories in which the characters do things that “they wouldn’t do” or “that don’t make sense for them.” This often happens when the plot seems to dictate one thing when the character’s intrinsic nature dictates something else. If you don’t have a strong sense of the character or tools to keep track of these things, you need this book to help you navigate the complexity. (Yes, I’ll publish “All Stories Are Love Stories” soon.)

Relationships Are Always Central to Your Life

I’ve spent many years working with coaches in preparing to make this my full-time job. I was on Alessandra’s podcast back in 2021 to talk about “Do You Need a Writing Coach?”. I first met Becca (my first writing coach) in 2019 and I still meet monthly with Susan and Samara from Becca’s Better-Faster Academy.

Those coaching relationships organically led me to the past three years of working with Claire which has been good self-work that has enabled me to evacuate my thirty-five year career (and maintain my sanity), to become the husband my soulmate deserves (and understand her better), and provide better insights and feedback to my clients and creative partners. For example, I re-read this post about Six-Eight Relationships every week and it’s been deeply valuable to my thirty-four year marriage.

Writing can make you a better person, in part, by letting you practice difficult relationships and wearing other people’s personalities to figure out how other people think and what they value in ways that can be wildly different from you. Claire’s book will help you study humans and human psychology in a structured way.

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The First Book

Write Iconic Characters, the first reference book in the Enneagram for Authors series, is a great set of tools for writers who’re already familiar with the enneagram and a fabulous introduction to characterization with the enneagram for anyone who is new to enneagram. Producing authentically motivated characters who act in a legible, credible manner is often hard when the needs of the plot loom large. Claire’s book provides guidance about how the character side of the coin balances its partner on the plot side of the narrative gold piece you’re minting. 🪙

The Next Book

As I said, this post is (in part) selfish. I want Claire to launch the Kickstarter for Write Iconic Relationships. But she won’t until she hits a minimum number of people who’ve clicked the Notify Me on Launch button. If this sort book interests you, do me (and Claire) a favor and click the button. 🙏

Wondering why your enemies-to-lovers trope is falling flat?

Struggling to craft the perfect mentor or sidekick for your protagonist?

Stumped on how to make your villain get under your hero’s skin?

Crafting an iconic character is essential to writing an unforgettable story, but it’s the relationships between our characters that grab readers by the shirt collar and don’t let them go.

In Write Iconic Relationships: Creating page-turning chemistry for lovers, friends, and enemies, you’ll unlock the secrets of creating dynamics that capture the hearts and imagination of readers long after they read the final page.

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Want Help With Your Relationships?

Couples therapy is hard for every author, but often necessary, even in nonsexual bromances like Lethal Weapon and Die Hard. Talking your characters into cooperating (or breaking up) is a real challenge. If you’d like help with that, call me and let’s chat about how I can help you with your relationships with your imaginary friends.

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Teh FTC and other busybodies on the internet want me to warn you that I may earn a commission from affiliate links on this website. This means, if I’m a good boy, some company I link to may give me a penny or two. You have been warned.

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⛺️ Free Novel Summer Camp ⛺️

At ProWritingAid’s Novel Camp 2026, I will be presenting a session called Stick the Landing: How to Create a Cathartic and Satisfying Conclusion. Here’re the deetz:

There’s a lot to consider about THE END before (and maybe after) you type those words…for each novel. Are you sure you got everything? Do you know what to check for? Do you know how to even check? Join us for some satisfying tools and scintillating conversation about how to know you’re done when you’re done.

Sign up today so you don’t forget. 😏

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⭐️ I did announce the big (for me) preorder, but in case you missed it:

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